Think you’re Pretty Good at Frittering Away Time?

So you spend hours on Twitter.  Every meal you’ve had for the past two years is lovingly displayed on Instagram.  You’ve Pinned every other page you’ve Stumbled across, and to save us all from embarrassment we won’t even mention that stuff you put on Facebook .

You are an Always-On, Always-Connected, Early-Adopter, Beta Version, Master Time Squanderer.  Nothing can stand between you and your quest to produce the greatest body of work in the universe which is of absolutely no value to to any human.

Well; you don’t know nothing.

Learn from the Old Dutch Master.  And when I say old, I mean 1600’s.  No computers, no phones, no electricity, shit I’m not sure if light had been invented back then.

This guy, Athenasius Kircher, (oddly enough, that’s my next door neighbor’s name) spent some serious time and brain power working on the illustration I’ve linked to below.  This ain’t no sketch on the back of a napkin either, this is an Engraving. In other words, he carved this thing into a big sheet of something, probably copper, in order to make the prints.  This thing could have taken years.

And what, I am sure you are asking by now, did he spend so much time and effort and probably blood, (cause those little gravers are dang sharp and I have heard he was something of a klutz,) laboring so diligently to produce?

No less than the definitive, argument-ending, last and final word on that age-old, thorny conundrum that has been the ruination of so many of the world’s best minds; just how the hell did Noah fit all those damn animals in that little boat he built in the back yard?

Somewhere in my head I can hear old Athenasius’s mom, yelling from the backyard with a clothespin in her mouth: “When you gonna look for a job Nasus?”

Check this out:

http://houghtonlib.tumblr.com/post/58237361384/athanasius-kircher-optica-projectio-trium-arcae

You can click on the pic and then click on the Online boxes on the next page to see detailed images.  It really is quite a piece of work.

 

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